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Sometimes, women play penpal for a month and then show up looking five years older and thirty pounds heavier than their photo. This is what’s wrong with my beloved online dating – and Tinder takes it to the extreme.Because of this experience, these men decide that they need to move even FASTER. Gone are those pesky profiles, monthly subscriptions, and email functionality. But, for the life of me, can someone explain to me how getting to know someone LESS and meeting them ASAP is going to make for a superior dating/relationship experience?Tinder is all about instant gratification, when instant gratification is the biggest problem with dating. So online dating – for most people who don’t know what they’re doing – turns into this revolving door of instant gratification. Women being pursued aggressively by dozens of guys at a time, all of whom want to meet her right away, communicating only by text, and not building up any trust, rapport or anticipation before the date.
So forgive me when I issue a review of the product without having actually used it. Because she’s afraid that he’s a cute guy who’s gonna move on.
I was the keynote speaker at the Matchmaker’s Conference cruise and saw a Power Point presentation of all the dating sites and apps that have recently gained in popularity.
I didn’t think too much of it until a client told me that she had signed up for it at the behest of a friend.
Basically, it takes everything that is bad about online dating and amplifies it, while muting the good parts – the ability to read, to flirt, to screen, to get to know each other organically before you meet in person.
More winks, shorter form emails, giving their phone numbers in that first email approach, “Hey Nancy, read your profile. With Tinder, you can look at someone’s photograph, see how close they are by GPS, and pretty much start talking in real-time. Because if I have 50 hot women blinking within a 5 mile radius with no real substance in their profiles, you can be 100% percent sure of one thing: I’m not taking any of them seriously.
It’s great for instant gratification; it’s pretty bad if you want to feel remotely special or connected before you go out to dinner.